The Ripple Effect: How Our Connections Shape Who We Become

It's Saturday morning in LA, just after 9 AM, and I'm people-watching from my usual weekend spot at Groundwork Coffee. There's something about Saturday mornings that feels like possibility – like the weekend is still this blank canvas waiting for your brushstrokes.

After yesterday's quiet moment in that hidden garden (still can't believe I went through three years here without finding it), I've been thinking about relationships and how they've shaped me. Not just romantic ones (though don't worry, I'll get to my disastrous Hinge date later), but all the connections that have subtly molded who I am.

Looking around this coffee shop, I realize how much of "me" is actually reflections of others. My obsession with vintage denim? That's all Mom. My color-blocking techniques? Straight from Professor Chen. Even my coffee order (oat milk latte with an extra shot) came from that design intern I idolized freshman year.

It's like we're all these walking mosaics of everyone we've ever loved, admired, or even disliked. The girl I was six months ago – the one desperately curating perfection – was shaped by relationships too. By Instagram influencers I'd never met, by competitive classmates, by an ex who once called my design aesthetic "trying too hard."

But this version of me that's emerging lately? She's being shaped by different influences. By friends like Jen who reflect back my growth. By professors who value authenticity over technical perfection. By that senior designer who guest-lectured last month and admitted she still sometimes cries in fabric stores when deadlines loom (I've never felt so seen).

We don't evolve in isolation. We become ourselves through these countless interactions, these mirrors that others hold up to us. The trick, I'm learning, is to be intentional about which reflections you internalize.

So this weekend, I'm making a conscious choice about who gets to influence my evolution. I'm meeting my mom for lunch to rediscover those parts of her I want to keep carrying. I'm finally RSVP'ing yes to that design collective Jen keeps inviting me to. And I'm deleting dating apps for a while because, honestly, some mirrors distort more than they reveal.

Maybe true maturation is just becoming more selective about who gets to shape you – choosing your influences rather than absorbing them unconsciously.

So here's to Saturday revelations and the beautiful, messy mosaic of connections that make us who we are.