When "I Don't Know" Feels Like Freedom**

It's 9:00 AM (shocking, I know), and I'm back in my coffee shop corner—without Jake sliding into the seat across from me. He's working the early shift today, which means I get to sit here alone with my thoughts and my oat milk latte (extra shot, because midterms).

Here's the thing: 24 hours ago, I was high on the thrill of someone choosing my mess. But last night, something shifted. Jake asked me "What are we?" over lukewarm takeout in my studio, and instead of panicking or crafting some perfectly vague-yet-charming answer, I just... said, "I don't know."

And for the first time, it didn't feel like failure. It felt like freedom.

I used to think growth meant having all the answers—knowing exactly who I am, what I want, how every story ends. But the more I try to force clarity, the more I realize: life isn't a mood board. You can't pin everything into place. Sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is admit you're still figuring it out.

So yeah, I don't know if Jake and I are "dating" or just two people who really like sharing tacos and bad reality TV takes. I don't know if this avant-garde dress I'm working on is genius or garbage (jury's out). And I definitely don't know how I'm going to balance my design portfolio with my looming midterms.

But here's what I do know: I'm tired of performing certainty. Of pretending I've got a five-year plan when most days, I'm just trying to remember to charge my laptop. Maybe growth isn't about arriving—it's about letting yourself be in the in-between.

So for now, I'm embracing the "I don't know." The unanswered texts, the half-finished projects, the way my heart races when Jake smiles at me but I'm not ready to define why. Because the magic isn't just in the destination—it's in the messy, uncertain, exhilarating getting there.

And honestly? That’s kind of beautiful.

xx Mandy

(P.S. Jake just winked at me from behind the counter. Still don’t know what that means either—and I’m weirdly okay with it.)